42

I will be 42 years old next month. I am sitting here thinking what's next. Thinking how much my illness has progressed and wondering the dreaded what next?

I survived carbon monoxide poisoning but for 12 years surviving the after effects is killing my body. I fell again last week. Vertigo attack. All I was doing was taking curtains down. Then I was down on the ground and in pain. Went to urgent care, nothing broken. The pain is immense.

Life has allowed me to get several certifications, a degree in astrology and parapsychology, natural health consulting, wedding planner, graphic designer, Holistic Health Practitioner, Holistic Business. My journey into the other dimension takes me into my Spiritual Healing degree. But my business side is going to finish public relations and take business management. On the domestic side I will be taking hvac, and electrical. Due to owning a century home. Work is always needed. Think I may learn drywall.

My brain goes and follows knowledge. I am constantly learning more things. Ever expanding to the wisdom of the universe.

I have met so many wonderful, loving, compassionate and helpful people on my journey. You know who you are and how close you are to my heart.

My next path and milestone is turning 42. What will it bring? What will I learn? Who will I met? What will be necessary for me to grow? Those questions are what I will hold close as I turn 42

I think over the years what I have learned and gained. What I can remember. The carbon monoxide took some of my memories. It is like trying to look back cause you remember something but it is only a fragment. Life is like a bunch of fragments we are always trying to put those pieces together.

At 42 my body is week, poisoned, and broken. Yet I still stand tall and hold on to what I have. Continue to study and run my businesses until the goddess decides I should stop. Which she has no plans to do that for a long while.

So I move on doing what I can do with my life. I am in denial with what I can't do. Yes we healers can be a warrior to oir own health issues. We can help heal others but just not our selves. I walk thr path of a wounded warrior at 42 and on.

Life always moves forward you can't go back.